I can't help myself. I just can't get into anything that people are putting out right now. And until Between the Buried and Me release an album teaser, at the very least, I'll be forced to sit back and listen to these guys put out more garbage,
which definitely relates to the angsty teen buried within me, but doesn't quite slake the musical thirst of the somewhat intelligent being I consider myself to be.
September of this year just might be the musical apocalypse as another "totally fucking metal" tour is set to hit the US and Canada. The Night of the Living Shred tour will be headlined by All Shall Perish and Born of Osiris and will feature Caliban, Suffokate (whose name I just had to look up because the spelling is so ridiculously brutal), and After the Burial as well.I suggest you hit up this tour if you want a cheap colonoscopy, but undergoing the actual medical procedure might be more exciting than the numerous bass drops and chugging you're certain to experience at these shows.
Not to mention "that guy" who, during every song by every band, will throw up some horns, elbow you in the side, and yell "THESE GUYS ARE METAL AS FUCK! WOOO!" Did I mention "that guy" will make up about 95% of the audience at these shows?
Stay at home, smoke a ton of pot, and eat Chunky Monkey out of the back of your toilet. It'll actually provide you with more neural stimulation than anything After the Burial can manage to produce.
As if my week wasn't bad enough, U2 is being featured in some new commercial for BlackBerry. Featured also in the video is a giant pair of singing wrap-around sunglasses and lighting effects a la boring-as-hell planetarium. The song featured is "I'll Go Crazy If I Don't Go Crazy Tonight," and boy can those sunglasses belt out a tune.
Literally blinded by his own awesomeness.Sarcasm aside, U2's latest album No Line on the Horizon just might be the worst album I've ever heard in my life, and I used to listen to Hanson. (No offense to Hanson. It's a compliment. "Mmmbop" is actually more intelligible than the horseshit Bono spews from his mouth.)
Speaking of God awful music, I've been pondering something recently:
Are people actually proud that they listen to Nickelback? Like, do you ever see someone wearing a Nickelback shirt who isn't painting his house or using it to shield his face to run through a burning building? Chew on that for a little while.
Do people actually enjoy my music? I wondered quietly to myself.A few things have actually caught my interest, though, for good reasons.
Mika has a new single/video up for his latest record, The Boy Who Knew Too Much (due out September 21st), entitled "We Are Golden."
And any accusations that listening to Mika make me "totally gay" can be combated with this logic: Mika is musically catchy, not catchy like those bands that take pictures of themselves looking silly, holding balloons or cats or their own penises, and base their MySpace pages around their Twitters, you know, in case you truly give a shit as to what these bros are doing.Speaking of Twitter... fuck Twitter. Here's my attempt at a Twitter post.
writing a new entry for my blog. @whogivesaflyingfuck.
Shut the hell up.
I digress.
Craig Owens has a solo EP due out soon, and has recently posted a pretty rad track on his MySpace, entitled "All Based on a Storyline."
Granted all of Owens' stuff sounds exactly like the rest of Owens' stuff (Chiodos, Cinematic Sunrise, etc.), which goes to show how much creative control the frontman truly has over those groups, I still find myself getting my groove on to whatever he puts out. Craig Owens could record himself eating peanut butter, and I would give it more than a couple listens.
Every Time I Die posted a new video, and it's quite possibly my favorite thing ever right now. I already preordered their new CD, so you'll have had enough of me talking about them soon.
I'm still waiting for someone to grab my attention span and spank the hell out of it.
Other than that, I've just stopped caring.
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